There have been beautiful and terrible things to come out of the internet.
This is one of the beautiful things. It’s a hodgepodge, technicolor, acid-trip nightmare of clip-art, piss-poor animation, and All-Star power forward Chris Bosh saving the world from an evil sorceress in the multiverse.
There are many questions. First off, who made this? Who has been surviving off of drinking bleach and codeine long enough to create something like this?
Was it created as a maniacal and mind-numbing way to explain Chris Bosh’s postseason injury and Mike Miller’s sudden surge in Game 5 of last year’s NBA Finals? Or was somebody already making it, then watched the Finals, and simply put the pieces in place?
Also, for something that appears to be colored and drawn by that little girl from ‘The Hills Have Eyes’, the animation on Mike Miller is excellent. They have him down to a science, even adding the gums that separate his top lip and teeth.
They even throw in the homeless guy who had his face chewed off as a hero. Naturally, the aftermath of his face looked like a close-up of pizza.
Oh, and Eric Reid and Tony Fiorentino? This is obviously done by a fan of the Heat. They nailed Fiorentino’s slurred Brooklyn accent and the possibility that he is on hard drugs during telecasts.
All of this and I have gotten into Miller being possessed by a werewolf, a dolphin with abs and Spanx with a knife that rides on roller-skates, a villain who I’m pretty sure is the same villain from Power Rangers, and the scrawl on the top of the Heat scoreboard reading “GOOD JOB MIAMI HEAT”.